MIA @ Real Time with Bill Maher, this Friday.

MIA somehow managed to get into Real Time with Bill Maher this Friday. Real Time with Bill Maher is one of the top liberal US political shows and a good one too. This time, in this interview, she went on saying "you have to understand in Sri Lanka, not a single Sinhalese person is been convicted of a crime for 60 years". And Bill was surprised by that statement, and so does I. Bill ask "Any Crime?" and she said "No". Bill asked again "Not even shop lifting?" and she said "nothing."

I don’t know what to say about these kind of talk. Can I say it is a lie? If I say that, wouldn’t I imply you are idiot without what so ever self judgment?

Can I Give Sri Lankan Army the Benefit of the Doubt?

I can’t watch pictures of dead children any more, without making me chock and feeling utterly helpless. I don’t know what it is to a parent to lose a child, but I know what it is to have a child. And I can’t possibly imagine how a parent could bear lost of a child.

1000 people dead one say, 2000 people dead say others. Just numbers, anonymous people, rounded up to last digits for our convenience. But they all are people with faces, legs and hopes, some are parents to a child like our parents and some child to a parent like our children.

As a citizen in a democratic country, I have a moral and civil responsibility to what our army is doing. If Sri Lankan Army shelled on those civilians, they should burn in hell, we all should burn in hell, because we know better, because we have other options. We drag this war more than a quarter century. I know every single day it drag further, it only bring suffering to everyone, but we could wait couple of more days, couple of more weeks, if needed couple of more months. We don’t have to risk large number of civilians. We shouldn’t have risk children. There are other options. There are better options.

But at this moment, I’m willing to accept government’s version of the story and give benefit of the doubt to Sri Lankan Army, only because LTTE does not have any military power that they can use for a victory or even for survival against Sri Lankan military, but they still don’t want to surrender, because they have a single card left, which they have been using quite vigorously and successfully. Civilians. They keep on holding thousands of civilians that they collected on their retreat, not to keep as pets, or as hotel guests, but for their military use, just like bullets, buckets and such other objects that they may dispose for their tactical benefit. And Canadian and British LTTE members propagate civilian death to the maximum military benefit of LTTE. More civilians die, more children die, more advantage they collect. Attract enemy fire on to civilians or deliberately killing civilians for propaganda, always has been fully working tactic for LTTE. In the absent of military power, I don’t think LTTE is sitting around a table playing cards with each other smoking cigars, or drinking tea or reading comic books. They are working on the only tactic left for them to reach their goal – a ceasefire. That is kill civilians, thousands by thousands, until so call “international community” forces government to go to a truce. It is brutal tactic. But it is a working tactic. It is bloody working tactic.

I’m in the Channel 4 News Piece About War in Sri Lanka!

I guess you have seen above Channel 4 News piece and wonder who those shadowy figures are. I’m here to put your mind to rest - that was me, the first shadowy figure with the title “Aid worker”. The second guy is one of my good friends. Now before you say anything, I just want to say, it is nothing personal, just pure british way of investigative journalism. I’m just doing my job. Nevertheless, we were paid handsomely and we were also told there is a big possibility for us to get UK visa with the help of Channel 4.

We shoot this little news piece in Juliana hotel in Kolpity, where we all had a very good time with very most gorgeous ladies. If you listened to news piece carefully, I almost blow the whole thing up with the story, “the dead woman with worms coming out of the mouth, while children playing around her”. But I could have blow this up big time, if I said what I was really about to say. A woman was dead for days and her few weeks old baby trying to feed on her breast. I saw that sort of a scene in a movie, I think it was in the HBO miniseries Rome. But luckily, last minute I thought it would be overly dramatic.

The video footage of the camp, well, I was able get that copy for Channel 4 from a friend of mine, a DIG in the Police, from the police video unit. As you see, even my DIG friend’s driver, Corporeal Samaranayaka, is in that video in his uniform. I know the video does not synch very much with the storyline. But the video cost us only a diner, few bottles and a trip to the heath center at Galadari hotel, where my DIG friend spend couple of happy hours with most beautiful ladies. But Isn’t it priceless when present as a secret hidden footage from a death camp in a third world country, with the soft sad narrative in the backgroud?

The news crew from Channel 4 was wonderful. I met those British journalists who break the story of “Rubina Ali’s father (Slumdog Millioner child actress) trying to auction his daughter shamelessly, to the highest bidder, as those people in third world countries often do”. If you remember, Indian police found out it was a made up story and her father never tried to auction his daughter, as British media claimed. But story was already sold for a price you won’t believe, and it was a top story all over the world. Anyway, no one believes Indian police or any other authority from any third world countries. Third world countries are always corrupt and without whatsoever moral values. Everyone in developed countries knows that. So it do not have to be a "real story", as long as it provide enough shocking value and the sense of moral superiority to the audience (journalist students – take notes). Before you say anything bad about these guys, who are trying to make a living, I want to tell you, it is not like they are holding a bottle of fake “yellowcake” in UN meeting, cooking up a reason to invade another country or something like that. These are just innocent news stories.

I know, some may deeply question the validity of this post and rightfully so. Some always do. So let me tell you something. I know, I’m a blogger, not a journalist. But when I write a post, I try my best to follows same journalistic standards Channel 4 and other numerous British news organizations proudly follows. So if you have any questions about the validity of this story, please contact Channel 4. I made my claim, I know it is shocking, and claims without proofs are just humbug to intelligent mind, But I’m a shadowy figure, and you can not quection shadowy figures. So now it is Channel 4's turn to deny my claim, if they are not true.

Swine Flu for Dummies

White people, generally spend their day talking about handbags, sushi and such things, while having London Fog Tea latte in Starbucks, needs something to make them panic once in a while to complete their life. They usually jump out of perfectly fine air planes and call it sky diving or engage in horrible activity call bungee jumping. But not everyone can personally put their lives in such risks for their own amusement, so they find something exciting in mass scale between each Olympic. One time they waited till air plans to drop out from the sky and world to end, and called it Y2K. And this year they find something new, called it Swine flu.

Swine flu is a flu presumably originated in Mexico as they say, and so far around 20 people died out of around 800 confirmed cases. This brings perfect drama for white people to start panicking, and we follow white people as ducklings as we usually do, start testing passengers with flu like symptoms in our Airport and discuses about it while we are getting drunk. But meanwhile, plain old flu, causes 500,000 deaths each year, but it is too common and has no theatrical value in it. Something new gives governments a reason to spend large amount of money on vaccinations and such things, that to be throw away unused in couple of years and drug companies to make large sum of money like it is Christmas. News corporations also get chance to report something all day without spending bit of money on camera crews or journalists.

Swine flu is a virus like any other flu, and virus as they usually do in their spare times, engages in evolution. But some people who do not believe in evolution in the first place, thrilled by the Swine flu, so they can say, “Look! Look! We were correct; pigs are bad, dirty and unholy! Since we are correct this time, we are correct all other times!! You unbelievers will go to hell and bake live in slow heat”. But the sad story is, they were not able to find any pig with swine flu virus yet, even if it is called swine flu. So black pork curries are still delicious as they been for past couple of thousand years and it will continue to feed us for years to come.

I’m not saying we should not protect ourselves from swine flu, or any other flu, but all I’m saying is normal dull old flu is far more dangerous and deadlier than the swine flu. And H1N1 flu as they call it now, will evolutes in to something else next year, if not in next couple of months.